Retirement?

I believe this will be my last year of teaching.  

After thirty-five years in a field where perfection or even true mastery is just an imaginary and unobtainable goal, it may be time to try something else.  I thought I would have it down by now and retirement would happen after it becomes old hat.  The truth is, I'll never be satisfied with my own job as a teacher and I'll never reach a level where I can't improve.  Those who think they have reached that level are wrong.

Energy is still an issue for me.  Fatigue after a day of working with students and trying to connect in a way that is meaningful is still my greatest health issue.  They say my body is still getting used to having new blood from a stranger.  It is supposed to sap energy and cause all kinds of illness.  The illnesses are fading but the energy issue is something that I can't seem to beat.  

In spite of these depressing thoughts, I feel extremely lucky to be alive.  I'm still looking forward to the certainty that I will be completely cured of myeloma.  I've worried about sickness for too long.